How to deal with challenging negotiations

I meet many people who give up quickly. They don’t instantly get what they want and then, for example, say that it is not possible. 

They are absolutely right. It is difficult or even impossible to reach their initial goal. 

Because life and relationships are about negotiation. About finding compromises. About creating solutions that work for both sides. 

Giving up means that they don’t even use the chance to try again. They might be reaching something just as great with a second try. They might need to revisit one hundred times to find a solution. Yet this will still be better than nothing. 

Especially if you are in challenging negotiations, instead of giving up, try this: 

What is the smallest common ground you can find with your negotiation partner? 

Try to reach as high as possible, but accept that it could be as low as this: You are two human beings, sitting in the same room, and both have the intention to find a solution. 

No one wants to leave a negotiation realizing that the shared common ground is just tiny. That they spent hours preparing, hours discussing - and all that’s left is two human beings sitting in the same room. It feels like nothing. It creates frustration. Maybe you start realizing that there is still such a long way to go.

In most negotiations, you can add more points to your shared objective, but sometimes you need to start as small as this. Trust me, this is still better than giving up. 

Before giving up, you can also (additionally) go with this option:

If you cannot reach your initial goal, what is an alternative version that would be acceptable for you? Maybe the result would not match you one hundred percent, but you would still prefer it instead of not getting anything. 

What are your experiences in challenging negotiation settings?